Revival of the Morning Pages!

The Morning Pages – For everyone's viewing pleasure (if you even consider all this ranting pleasurable)

Life Update:

I was supposed to get up at 1 am to study. When I did, I set the alarm at 2, so I could have one more precious hour of sleep. At 2, I was in too deep a sleep to even hear the alarm. I woke up at a quarter to 7, and have been studying ever since.

Moving on...

My morning prayers have no longer been a part of my routine since... well , a long time now. In fact, just praying in general has seemed to evaporate from my life. That sounds horrible, I know. I refuse to believe that my commitment to follow God was merely a phase. But that’s what it looks like now. I want to change, I do. It seems as though there are so many things preventing me from doing so – first and foremost, the animal i have become. Hahaha. Okay, a little too much, but that’s how it feels :( I don’t want to make promises I can’t keep because for the past couple of months, that’s all I’ve been making.How do I get back to where i was before? I’ve never been so lost in my life. It’s never been so dark. I need to find Him again, if it’s the last thing i do. (What i fear is going to happen, is that an hour from now, this resolve will have been forgotten, and I’ve got this gut feeling that that’s where this is going.)

Cheers!

-jejecola-